Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A Tip For 'Big Oil.'

I heard this on Beck's radio show today, and it's what we should all be screaming at our so-called servants of the People.

OK, so it's not really a sensible living tip, but I couldn't help myself:


GLENN: Enough. We brought together the heads of big oil. See that big head over there? Yeah, he runs Shell. That one? That runs ExxonMobil. Mr. Big oil, we're here to talk about the high price of gasoline. How could it have possibly gotten this high?

Let me tell you what we've done here in congress. We told you that drilling in ANWR is off limits. We told you that drilling off the coast of Florida and California is off limits. We told you, Mr. Big oil, that there wouldn't be any new leases for drilling in the Gulf while China and Venezuela and even Cuba pursued these leases and have just signed 100-year leases on the oil in the Gulf of Mexico. We here in congress have promised, as all three presidential candidates have also promised, to introduce and pass in the next term a cap and trade legislation bill that will increase the price of gasoline according to the EPA by an additional $1.50. Some people say it could be as high as $5 additional per gallon. Order, order. We have said that we're shutting down oil fields in Colorado. We won't let you develop shale oil fields in several Western states. And yesterday we passed legislation that would let us sue OPEC with the full understanding that they'll never retaliate. Yes. We have allowed environmental attorneys to sue you big oil fiends for future possible destruction of Alaskan Eskimo village which legal experts believe is the same strategy used to bring down big tobacco. We're especially proud of our recent action to protect the polar bear and their habitat which just happens to be where the future oil deposits happen to be located. We told you that you're making too much money and that we're looking at seizing any money that we consider windfall profits. Yes. We have allowed you to drill in some very small areas in Alaska while simultaneously creating very generous environmental laws which have tied up the very production we authorize through years of litigation after you spent the money on buying and setting up equipment. We told you through our policies that we would not allow you to build a new refinery in over 30 years. In fact, this great country, under our tutelage, has even reduced the number of operational refineries by half since 1982. Order, order, order. We have even told your potential competitors in the nuclear and hydroelectric industries that we would send the environmental lawyers after them if they even dared think about building a new plant or a new dam. We've refused to fund or allow the deployment of coal-to-oil technology which has been around since the 1930s. We've told you that you have to make different blends of gasoline, let states like California dictate what unique gasoline blends you have to make for them. We will not reduce our federal gasoline tax. We won't even consider reducing it for the summer months. So Mr. Big oil, tell me why exactly are gas prices so high? Order, order!

Stop. That's what should be said. Thank you. That's what should be said. Instead congress is going to bring big oil in front of them today and say, "Oh, oh, are you price gouging?" .

13 comments:

nanc said...

holy crappe!

y'all've been busy while i've been entertaining in-laws!

CONGRATULATIONS!

Elmers Brother said...

this was good Brooke

The Merry Widow said...

I put up a link to Gasbuddy, you can check for the lowest prices in your area, by zip code.
Handy!

tmw

David Schantz said...

I heard something on the radio yesterday about how much oil company CEO's are bringing home a year. My simple little mind won't let me type numbers that big.

God Bless America, God Save The Republic.

Karen said...

Terrific post. Hey, let's go after the head of entertainment studios and the mega millions that are their salaries, or the super stars. Let's just tax success over and over so no one ever wants to take a risk.

Ducky's here said...

mw, Mr. Beck (full disclosure: I think he's a butt hat) begs the question of whether or not this is a strict supply and demand problem.

I want to see an analysis of the demand curve that has prices up 150% of The Dauphin's presidency.

And all these tax breaks we gave these mamalucs. Weren't they off drilling in west Africa or the like?

And a discussion of gas prices without mentioning The Dauphin's magnificent tanking of the dollar with the help of "Bubbles" Greenspan?

And all that turmoil in stocks and housing. Is it a surprise that the wealthy head for the commodities market to stuff it to us with big run ups in oil futures? It was about the only place they could make some serious dough.

Energy prices is a complex topic. Much too complex for a blowhole like Glen Beck. Man, he's dumb.

Ducky's here said...

Integrated oil companies are making record profits. Why would they want to build more refineries?
Would that increase their profits.

I hope Glen "Airhead" Beck has some analysis of refinery pricing and can point to a situation where the high cost per barrel is causing a squeeze on refinery profits. My guess is that he's too stupid to have a clue.

I'll wait to see a study on gas prices from someone who knows his ass from his elbow.

FJ said...

Gee, you sensible folks need some graphics. A picture's worth a thousand words. ;-)

Congrats on the website. Look out Martha Stewart!

Always On Watch said...

Duck,
There you are! I've been wondering where you've been.

BTW, this is Brooke's posting, not TMW's. Full disclosure, you know.

What movie this weekend, Duck?

Eyes said...

Hey, cool! It will be interesting to stop by.

How about some "Shareholders Unions" to reduce the CEO's pay checks? There's no way what they do is worth $5 million + dollars a year. Boards of Directors are private clubs, and the shareholders are too diverse to get organized...

That being said, the bottom line is buying and building more fuel efficient cars (IMHO). Have you seen Dubai photos lately? Fuel dollars at work...

I'm thinking people are becoming more and more stupid/greedy as time goes by...

Beamish said...

Educate thyself, Ducky.

nanc said...

f.y.i - gasoline was SEVENTEEN CENTS cheaper a gallon in missouri yesterday when we went to branson - soooooooooo, we tooled around and burnt up our 'spensive fuel and filled up on our way home!

The Merry Widow said...

I passed a BP this morning, $4.019 for regular...

tmw